IVF #3

So IVF #3 starts tomorrow and I am trying to decide how I feel about it.  I am not really excited or nervous, or scared like the last two cycles.  I just am.   I force myself to sound positive when I talk about this cycle, but I don't think I really feel positive.  I don't feel negative either.  I kind of feel that I am in emotional limbo and oddly I think I am ok with that.

I think that part of the problem is that I feel like this cycle just snuck up on me.  Usually I spend so much time planning everything out and I just didn't this cycle.  My consents are notarized but not filled out,  I still need to call the pharmacy and schedule my delivery date for my meds, and I am sure there are other things I need to do but I just don't feel like being crazy planner lady this cycle.  I'll get everything done when I get around to it.

I've been telling people that I don't have a resolution this year, but maybe I do.  Maybe my resolution is that I am not going to be  a crazy stressed out hormonal mess this cycle.  We'll see.