Beta #1 came back at 14.6. Not as high as I'd like, but it does mean that I am indeed pregnant. The nurse reassured me that the number is not as important as the beta doubling in 48 hours. So now it means I have a long 4 day wait for beta #2 on Monday, since my clinic won't order betas on the weekend.
I am trying to remain positive and focus on the fact that as of right now I am pregnant and my beta confirms this. I can understand why some clinics don't give out beta information until after the second beta. It is hard not to focus on the number.
I stocked up on FRERs and a box of digis. Hopefully I will continue to get positive HPTs and this will help keep me from going completely BSC this weekend.
I really need this baby to stick, I am in love already.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
7DP5DT I dipped a FRER and ...
BFP! OMG this really worked!
Now for the full story. After staring at a faint ghost line on a wondfo all evening yesterday (yes, I am that crazy), I decided that I would pee on a FRER. I never use a FRER because I hate the thought of wasting an expensive test on a BFN. I bought them to confirm a positive on a wondfo. So I wake up at 4:00 am and have to pee, so I grab a FRER and a wondfo and pee in a cup. I dip the wondfo and watch the test develop. It looks like a BFN, but then I could see another hint of a super faint line. I felt like this can not be a real line, since it's still so faint and doesn't seem to be getting darker.
I decide to go ahead and dip the FRER just to confirm my suspicions that this cycle was a BFN. I watch the test start to develop and the control line pops up and then a faint second line pops up. And it starts to get darker. Cue the four letter words (I think the exact words that I said to myself were HOLY F*CKING SHIT, IT'S POSITIVE).
So telling the hubs... After over 2 years of TTC, 4 IUIs, and 2 IVFs; all plans for a cute announcement went out the window a long time ago. So once I came out of shock of getting a positive test, I ran across the hall and flipped on the light in our bedroom (remember this is like 4:15 in the morning) and without waiting for him to fully wake up I yell, "What are you doing July 11th?" In his state of sleepiness says, "I don't know." I reply "How about having a baby, boom!" And hand him the FRER. Romantic right. He looks at the test and agrees that he sees a second line (Not that I needed confirmation with this one. My line eye is good, but I can't imagine that good of a line.).
The one worry point is that I never really tested out my trigger, but since I am 14 days past trigger and for all my IUIs my trigger was always out by 11ish days past trigger, I am pretty positive that this is not the trigger. Plus this is a pretty decent line on a FRER.
Now the obligatory pee stick photo (The line is darker and pinker in real life):
Now for the full story. After staring at a faint ghost line on a wondfo all evening yesterday (yes, I am that crazy), I decided that I would pee on a FRER. I never use a FRER because I hate the thought of wasting an expensive test on a BFN. I bought them to confirm a positive on a wondfo. So I wake up at 4:00 am and have to pee, so I grab a FRER and a wondfo and pee in a cup. I dip the wondfo and watch the test develop. It looks like a BFN, but then I could see another hint of a super faint line. I felt like this can not be a real line, since it's still so faint and doesn't seem to be getting darker.
I decide to go ahead and dip the FRER just to confirm my suspicions that this cycle was a BFN. I watch the test start to develop and the control line pops up and then a faint second line pops up. And it starts to get darker. Cue the four letter words (I think the exact words that I said to myself were HOLY F*CKING SHIT, IT'S POSITIVE).
So telling the hubs... After over 2 years of TTC, 4 IUIs, and 2 IVFs; all plans for a cute announcement went out the window a long time ago. So once I came out of shock of getting a positive test, I ran across the hall and flipped on the light in our bedroom (remember this is like 4:15 in the morning) and without waiting for him to fully wake up I yell, "What are you doing July 11th?" In his state of sleepiness says, "I don't know." I reply "How about having a baby, boom!" And hand him the FRER. Romantic right. He looks at the test and agrees that he sees a second line (Not that I needed confirmation with this one. My line eye is good, but I can't imagine that good of a line.).
The one worry point is that I never really tested out my trigger, but since I am 14 days past trigger and for all my IUIs my trigger was always out by 11ish days past trigger, I am pretty positive that this is not the trigger. Plus this is a pretty decent line on a FRER.
Now the obligatory pee stick photo (The line is darker and pinker in real life):
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
6DP5DT
Still seeing super faint lines on wondfo tests (both this morning with FMU and this evening when I got home from work). Part of me wants to be excited, but part of me thinks that these are just evap lines. I think at least some of the lines were visible around the 5 minute mark, which is the time limit for reading a wondfo. I mean if it were the real deal wouldn't the lines be getting darker? DH said that he saw the line on the test this evening, so I'm not completely crazy. Or if I am crazy at least my husband is right there with me.
I am going to take one of my FRERs tomorrow morning. I guess if I get a line on a FRER, then I will have to call it a BFP.
I am going to take one of my FRERs tomorrow morning. I guess if I get a line on a FRER, then I will have to call it a BFP.
Monday, October 28, 2013
I need to stop peeing on things!
So when I realized at lunch that I hadn't peed at work yet today, I made the decision to hold my pee so I could POAS when I got home. Because logically taking a test 12 hours after you already took a test makes complete sense. I had to stop by Walmart on the way home, so I was ready to pee my pants by the time I got home. I take another wondfo and another super faint barely there line. I am pretty sure it was there before the 5 minute time limit, so I am hoping that this is not an evap line. It could be the trigger still, though because it is super faint. I don't know what to think at this point.
5DP5DT
I didn't think it was possible, but an even lighter ghost line than yesterday. I am probably the only person in the world that can see it, which means that it might not even really be there. I am assuming that this is still the trigger shot, which is cruel 11.5 days after the trigger.
Sunday, October 27, 2013
4DP5DT
I still had a super light ghost of a line this morning, that or I have serious line-eye. I don't think it's possible to get a lighter line, so I am calling my trigger out of my system.
Now for the scary part, looking for the BFP. It's weird, testing the last few says wasn't scary or nerve wracking, because I knew it was my trigger. Now it's the real deal, I'm looking for my BFP.
I was so positive and calm the first few days after my ET. We transferred a good quality early blast and had a good shot at pregnancy. Now the closer we get to beta day, I am feeling less positive. I just feel like there is no way that this worked. Out of two IVF cycles we had 14 eggs retrieved and 8 fertilized normally. Of those 8 only 3 were decent quality (fragmentation and # of cells) on day 3 and only 1 made it to blast. What are the odds that this one lonely embryo is chromosomally normal and able to implant? I just feel like the odds are against us.
To make it worse, I haven't really had any symptoms. Maybe a little cramping, but it could also have been bloating/gas pain. My freaking boobs haven't even been sore. I've had more "symptoms" on Clomid cycles, when I didn't even supplement with progesterone.
Maybe I am just preparing myself for the worst. Since we didn't have anything to freeze, if this cycle fails, we'll be starting over with a third fresh IVF. Of course I will do whatever it takes, but financially we can only do so many fresh cycles. I am also afraid of what my RE will have to say if this cycle fails. Our cycle results so far have pointed to an egg quality issue. Is there even a point to trying again with my own eggs?
Please let this cycle work.
Now for the scary part, looking for the BFP. It's weird, testing the last few says wasn't scary or nerve wracking, because I knew it was my trigger. Now it's the real deal, I'm looking for my BFP.
I was so positive and calm the first few days after my ET. We transferred a good quality early blast and had a good shot at pregnancy. Now the closer we get to beta day, I am feeling less positive. I just feel like there is no way that this worked. Out of two IVF cycles we had 14 eggs retrieved and 8 fertilized normally. Of those 8 only 3 were decent quality (fragmentation and # of cells) on day 3 and only 1 made it to blast. What are the odds that this one lonely embryo is chromosomally normal and able to implant? I just feel like the odds are against us.
To make it worse, I haven't really had any symptoms. Maybe a little cramping, but it could also have been bloating/gas pain. My freaking boobs haven't even been sore. I've had more "symptoms" on Clomid cycles, when I didn't even supplement with progesterone.
Maybe I am just preparing myself for the worst. Since we didn't have anything to freeze, if this cycle fails, we'll be starting over with a third fresh IVF. Of course I will do whatever it takes, but financially we can only do so many fresh cycles. I am also afraid of what my RE will have to say if this cycle fails. Our cycle results so far have pointed to an egg quality issue. Is there even a point to trying again with my own eggs?
Please let this cycle work.
Saturday, October 26, 2013
3DP5DT
Today I am 3DP5DT (3 days past 5 day transfer) or 8 DPO. I am testing out my trigger shot. The trigger shot is the injection I took Wednesday October 16th to make my follicles mature and get ready for ovulation. The trigger shot contains the hormone HCG, which is the pregnancy hormone. This means that after the trigger shot you will get a positive HPT until the hormone from the shot leaves your system. For 10,000 IU HCG triggers (like I took), it usually takes about 10 days from the trigger to be completely out of your system. Today is 10 days and I still have a squinter of a line. Hopefully the line is gone tomorrow or gets darker. I would definitely prefer it to get darker. :)
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